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April 15 • Patient Patience

Day 280

My wife might tell you that impatience is not a problem for me, at least not compared to my patience. Compared to her, at least, I may have too much patience. That is, however, conflicted with my out-loud tendency for immediate gratification; I think my patience is with the bigger picture of life, including my recovery. But I see my impatience with those things with which I medicate myself, such as gizmos, games, and yes, sex. I am consciously trying to work on being more patient with the things I want now, and I'm also trying to be more intentional on the long-range goals and hopes. I need to demonstrate more planning and more steps for life down the road instead of just letting it come to me. It is all a strange conflict within my intellect and my emotions.



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