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October 02 • Success or Sobriety?

Day 450

What is the difference between a strong sex drive and sexual addiction?

I am conflicted by what seems to my observation to be a pattern of highly successful men (and women?) being particularly susceptible to outrageous sexual misbehaviors. Is there a correlation, or is there just more attention given to the powerful and famous?

Does this mean that a person in recovery is destined to choose between releasing his inner demons in the cause of accomplishment, and being a passive survivor in a mediocre but content existence?

I have no answers; I wonder whether anyone does. And if I had the answers, would it change my choices toward sobriety?

That answer, I do know. Today I choose to be sober.

If there ever develops a struggle between success and sobriety, I'll deal with that in the context of my sexual addiction. In the past, my disease has been just another factor, maybe even a victim, of my drive toward notoriety and image.

My prayer is that by unlinking these defects of extremes through the steps of the program, the likelihood of one being in the way of the other can be eliminated or at least significantly reduced. This is not a goal, but rather a hoped-for result of a healthier me doing the necessary work.



If I had his money I could do things my way

But little they know

That it's so hard to find one rich man in ten

With a satisfied mind

–Johnny Cash, ”Satisfied Mind"



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