top of page

September 06 • Hating Me in Thee

Day 424

As a kid, I would often be irritated by another kid's behavior that I thought was precocious or obnoxious. Almost without exception, I would find myself recognizing similar tendencies in my own life. For whatever reason, my repulsion was then turned on myself because I did not want to be like that other kid.

As an adult, it has been about the same. I've been blessed that I have not hated many people. Some I did not particularly like, but I tended to reserve my hatred for my own short-comings. When I would identify these in others, I was more likely to feel sorry for them than to dislike them. I would still get irate when I saw the same characteristics in myself.

This pattern seems to be different from a lot of fellow addicts that I hear talking about anger issues, and I don't have an explanation for that. Maybe I just don't want to be like them.

That was supposed to be a little touch of humor, but I don't think it came out that way.



My world is a zoo,

I don't like me and I don't like you.

No human emotion,

no tellin' what I'll do.

–Crucifix, ”Animal"



bottom of page